i have been doing a lot of thinking lately about my convictions. for example last summer (aka summer 2009) i was convicted not to cross the street at a red light. sure that's all fine and dandy when i am at my parent's house in ontario but what about when i am in the city and it's 2:30am and i am alone. should i do it then? is that being to legalistic? would God honour my decision to obey the lights and protect me from any creepster that may be around?

or what about what i decide to watch when i am with others. this summer (aka summer 2010) i was convicted about the things that i watch on tv. i'm not gonna lie, it was hard. goodbye big bang, goodbye the office, goodbye almost everything. this means that there is a lot that i should not be watching. this also means that it makes it hard to hang with certain people. not because i think they will judge me. no. it's because it means that every time they want to watch something that i have been convicted against watching, i will need to leave.

soo what's the big deal? well one day last week i was at a friend's place and one of the girls with us hadn't seen a particular tv show that i have been convicted about not watching. i will admit right here that i stayed. although i knew i needed to leave. i stayed because i wanted to protect my dig...no. actually? i just wanted to protect my pride. you are all probably wondering why. well one person that was there spoke up about starting to feel convicted about watching it and let's just say that i was glad that i wasn't in his position. not that it would have been terrible being in his position. it's just that i hate that feeling. like i am ruining everyone else's fun. cause that's how it has been for me my whole life. no joke. that amount of birthday parties that i ruined. oh man.

as i was walking home that evening though, i realized that it is important for me to stand up for my convictions. not in a "holier than thou" way. no, more in a "this is what i have been convicted on and so i am not going to do xyz" way. a loving way. and even if people hate me, what matters most is that God sees and is pleased when we follow in obedience. now to actually live it out.